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Living Today Like Your Husband Died Yesterday

May 21, 2024

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But the younger widows refuse: for when they have begun to wax wanton against Christ, they will marry; Having damnation, because they have cast off their first faith. And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not. I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully. For some are already turned aside after Satan. 

1 Timothy 5:11-15

When I started reading these verses the other day I had a few questions on my heart and as I read The Lord answered these questions. For a very long time society has sold us lies. Television and now social media have shaped our thinking to become so warped in ways we don’t even realize. One of these things is how close in friendship and relationship we should be with people outside our home.

As women we watch Hallmark movies showcasing the starlett and her best friend, who are interconnected in every way. They share every detail of life and bear their souls one to another. We’ve been made to feel this is the goal and if we don’t have it we are missing out. But as women when we do have interconnected relationships how do we handle them? 

What I’ve found as a woman is that most female relationships have a tendency, if not kept in check, to run this way: 

And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not. 

1 Timothy 5:13

If we as women are honest with ourselves we have to be guarded and careful, but our society takes everything in I Timothy 5:13 and praises it.  

Here are some definitions of these words according to the Strongs Concordance: 

Idle – inactive, i.e. unemployed; (by implication) lazy, useless 

Tattlers – (to bubble); a garrulous (talkative; pratting [One that talks much to little purpose, or on trifling subjects – Websters 1828]) person 

Busybodies – working all around, i.e. officious (Busy; intermeddling in affairs in which one has no concern – Webster’s 1828 [meddlesome]) 

How many times have we been pushed to be inactive in our homes? We all have cell phones in our hands, TVs on our walls, every appliance keeps us from working harder than necessary. We are encouraged to stop and stop often. Or we are pushed to be overactive outside of our home as if we do not have a job – unemployed. We are encouraged to give 200% just not in the God-given place we should be. 

Earthley

We are also encouraged to over share about subjects that have no substance or value. How often have you gotten a history lesson about someone’s life you never met or someone you are going to meet? Gossip is praised and looked at as just a normal female activity. But all of these things indicate one thing – your husband has died and is no longer available to keep you occupied in productive ways. You have no home to manage. 

This really hits home for me. I’ve felt a bit guilty for not reaching out more or not longing for female fellowship more but I also felt as if a lot of female fellowship brings out negative tendencies in my life and I don’t want to hinder others so I step back. Limited fellowship has been a blessing and benefit as I form deeper, godly relationships. In the limited fellowship I find myself more guarded with my tongue and more prayerful about my response. I find myself encouraging and being encouraged, but in the relationships that have ever had full, free access there is a tendency to not keep myself in check and to leave those interactions over thinking everything I said, knowing that I had crossed lines. In that time frame I have not been concerned with the needs of my home and family. I’ve lived like I’ve had no accountability or authority in my life. 

When we look at Titus 2 about the aged women’s instruction to the younger women we see first thing that she is told to watch her behavior. It wasn’t about what she could say with her mouth. It was about what she could live with her life. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the first thing she is told to be in her behavior is holy and then directly following, she’s not to be a false accuser. Her tongue and how she used it were to be directly addressed from the pulpit by Titus. When we come down to what she was to teach the younger women through this behavior of holiness it is to be a keeper at home.  This ties directly into I Timothy 5:13. She was to teach the younger women that they can be fully fulfilled in their own home. How is that done? By her being fully fulfilled in hers. She had to set the example to follow. 

This was not an example of laziness, talking too much about nonsense, or being the town or church gossip. She was to be directed by Titus as an aged woman not be a false accuser – a traducer; specially, Satan—false accuser, devil, slanderer (TRADU’CER, noun One that traduces; a slanderer; a calumniator. CALUMNIATOR, noun One who slanders; one who falsely and knowingly accuses another of a crime or offense, or maliciously propagates false accusations or reports. – Websters 1828) 

Only by not being a false accuser could she live up to the qualifications to teach the younger women to love their husbands and children. 

I said all of that to simply say- it’s okay to be a wife who enjoys her family and doesn’t have a ton of friendships, or even one, that takes up her daily time and attention. It’s okay to be so busy at home that you have to say, “No thank you!” to personal invites without guilt. It’s okay to go home when conversations start turning to tattling, busybodiness, or false accusation. It’s okay to find your refuge, joy, and fulfillment in your home, husband, children, and most of all The Lord. 

Having friends is not wrong. I am blessed with more friends than most people and I believe that is because they are limited in time and access. Friendship can become wrong when we are investing in those friendships as if we do not have anything to invest in at home. The Proverbs 31 woman is an amazing example used for us women a lot. Do you know what we don’t find in that passage? Her friends. I’m sure she had some. But, she was a queen who was busy running a castle. She had a husband, children, maidens to direct, goods to sell. She was busy. She was invested in the needs of her household first. 

This world tries to tell us that men are stupid, children are inconvenient, homes are to be picture perfect but not really lived in. That the only ones who get us are our friends and other women. That we can learn more at the feet of women than at the feet of Jesus. The world is wrong. I don’t want to live like my husband is dead. I don’t want to have a lifestyle that is indicative of a widow without authority and boundaries. I don’t want to treat my marriage as if it’s so secondary I need others to fulfill the voids, or treat my children like they are a bother to my life.

Earthley

It’s time to rise up and find the place God made for us. It will go against the grain of this world and even most Christian women. It’s time to rise up to enjoy our homes and to invest more heavily in our marriage than in our friendships. It’s time to find our place at Jesus’ feet and not at the feet of those who we long to gossip with. Lord, please help me and forgive me for my ignorance all these years. 

But as touching brotherly love ye need not that I write unto you: for ye yourselves are taught of God to love one another. And indeed ye do it toward all the brethren which are in all Macedonia: but we beseech you, brethren, that ye increase more and more;  And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you; That ye may walk honestly toward them that are without, and that ye may have lack of nothing.

1 Thessalonians 4:9-12

To all my godly friends that give counsel, take counsel, point me back to my husband, point me to God’s Word, and truly love me for who I am without false accusation, thank you!!! Thank you for serving The Lord first, your family second, for knowing your limits, and when to simply say, “I’m sorry, but I’m busy at home right now. I’m with my family.” I learn how to love The Lord more my watching you!!

With much love, 

Kate Ledbetter

Have you heard of Earthly Wellness? 
Earthly is a company dedicated to providing only natural, herbal wellness products and supplements for the entire family! My favorite thing about Earthly is that each product quickly and accurately tells if I can use it safely while pregnant and/or nursing. They have everything you need to start your non-toxic, chemical free journey to wellness! Go check them out at the link below and use code CHOOSENATURAL to enjoy 10% off your first purchase.

CLICK HERE!
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Hospital Bag Essentials: Everything You Need for an Amazing Hospital Birth

May 18, 2024

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Packing a hospital bag can be fun and honestly, overwhelming! As your big sisters in all things birth, labor, and baby- Anna and I thought it would be fun to combine our lists of hospital birth must haves. We hope this helps you as you prepare for your little one to arrive earth-side!

Tips for Packing Your Hospital Bag

1. Pack Early

It is recommended to have your bag ready to go by around the 36 week mark, simply because you never know what will happen. As two ladies who did not make it to full term with our babies we highly recommend having that bag packed BY the 36 week mark, if not before. It may be helpful to have a small bag to keep in your car, just for emergency sake.

Pack the bag early. Let people make fun of you, just pack it sooner than you think you need to. Sincerely, someone who went into labor early.

-aka Anna

2. Do not stress.

That being said, if you are approaching the 36 week mark or past it, there is no need to stress! Even if you go into labor early the likelihood that you will still have time to pack your hospital bag is pretty high. Once labor begins, in the early stages it is somewhat nice to have something to occupy your time/mind with.

Even if you have a true emergency and have no time to prepare, this is what family and friends are for! If you find yourself at the hospital with nothing or forget something important, reach out to someone in your support group.

3. Pack ALL the pain management things.

If you are planning on a natural birth experience do not feel bad about bringing anything/everything you think may bring you comfort during labor. You may find that certain things you thought would work for you do not while other things do. If this is your first baby it is likely going to be trial and error. Also, certain points of labor require different measures for pain. This differs for everyone so come prepared.

4. Babies come in all shapes and sizes.

You know this but no baby is the same! And just because the tag says “newborn” does not mean it is going to fit yours. We both would advise you pack 2-3 newborn outfits, and at least one each premie/0-3 month outfit. Even if your baby is measuring small, large, or “normal” size you never truly know until you know.

5. Comfort is key!

The trick to an enjoyable hospital birth experience is making sure you, dad, and baby have everything you need to be as comfortable as possible. This may mean a lot of packing but it is so worth it! If you sleep best with a box fan, bring it! If having your special cozy socks matters, bring them!

6. Let Dad pack the bag.

I have to give all the credit to Anna on this one (or whoever she stole the idea from- THANK YOU!). Since your husband will most likely be the one handing you all the things at the hospital, lay out your things and let him pack the bag. This completely eliminates the need for you to instruct him on where certain things are during labor. Trust me- the last thing you will want to do to your poor husband is get upset when you have to tell him step by step where everything is.

A big tip that I used was let dad pack the hospital bag. You lay out the items you want packed and let him put them in the bag. He is going to be getting the items for you at the hospital and you want him to be able to find everything.

Anna

7. Install the carseat BEFORE hand.

This is one of my (Tori) many regrets! Our birth story was kind of a whirlwind and we both definitely were NOT prepared. So the carseat was a very last minute thing! We honestly just threw all the parts in the car and it was up to my wonderful husband to figure it all out the day we left the hospital. It was not that is was a huge inconvenience, just frustrating and totally avoidable. A very kind nurse helped us figure it out, so should you forget or have questions concerning the safety of your carseat, find a nice nurse!

Everything Mom Needs at the Hospital

Clothing Items

  1. 1-2 actual outfits. In most cases you will be released in 24-48 hours after giving birth to a healthy baby. The majority of your stay you will likely be in labor and will want to be in a gown or nothing at all. Should you need extra clothing someone in your support group will be happy to go get some clothing. (If you are a long ways from home, you may want to consider packing extra outfits, just in case.)
  2. 1-2 gowns. Anna and I highly recommend two gowns, one to labor in and one for after labor. A few things to keep in mind when selecting gowns are- comfort, nursing accessibility (if planning to breastfeed), and know that they will get messy (so nothing super expensive or fancy).

I delivered in a hospital gown but brought my own for postpartum. Looking back I wish I would’ve brought two cheap throw away gowns for labor too. Hospital gowns are annoying. I say two because I needed a change during labor due to some, we’ll just say “labor fluids”. Make sure you get one that has easy access for nursing, and for any medical intervention should it arise.

Anna
  1. Super comfortable nursing bras. This is a must! If this is your first baby you likely have no idea what an actual comfy nursing bra means. Let me help you- super soft, yet supportive. I would definably recommend anything by Mom Cozy brand! So far they are the best I have found. (The jelly strip support is my favorite- click here to check it out!)
  2. Cozy socks.

Comfort Measures

  1. Your own pillow and/or blanket. This is super nice to have but the hospital will provide you with as many pillows and blankets as you need. If you decide to bring your own just know that they may get messy.
  2. Pain management. We will talk more about this in a coming post but you will want anything that will help keep you comfortable in labor. Anything to manage pain in a natural and even some medicated birth situations is great to have on hand. Some ideas: tennis balls for counter pressure, a labor comb, birthing ball, heating pad etc.
  3. Comfort items. Things to keep you comfortable throughout labor and beyond! Essential oils (and diffuser!) a candle, a speaker for music, a small fan, lights, etc.

Toiletries/Postpartum Care

  1. Deodorant, shampoo, body wash, toothbrush, makeup. All the things you would use on the daily. One of us may have forgotten a hairbrush and probably did not use one for the first week of motherhood (Tori).
  2. Postpartum care. The hospital will provide a lot of this for you but if there is any specific brand you want or special items you will want to bring that yourself. Some items we found helpful during the postpartum period were: adult diapers (STYLISH!), ice pads, nipple ointment, perineum itch spray, breast pads, ice/heat pads for breasts, silverettes, etc. (Click here for my favorite postpartum care set!)

Other

1. Food. Most hospitals follow the no eating in labor policy. You may want to bring a little something to eat during labor, and comfort foods after the fact. Protein drinks may help you keep your strength and energy up during labor.

Some hospitals say you can’t eat during labor (I say do what you want). You can bring protein shakes to help give you energy for birth and still abide by liquids only policy. Do your research on the risks and make your own decision on this one though.

Anna

2. Chapstick. For some reason that dry hospital air, combined with all the heavy breathing makes your lips absolutely parched! Bring some good quality chapstick.

3. Thank you cards. I wish I would have done this! You may not feel like writing a card and that is completely okay! However, if you do and certain members of staff made you feel like a QUEEN, you may wish you had some on hand to express your thanks.

Everything Your Support Person Needs at the Hospital

Your support person is a HUGE part of a great birth experience! You will want to make sure they have a list of what they will need during this time to make sure you and baby are safe and cozy.

  1. 1-2 outfits.
  2. IF you are planning a water birth they will need clothing that is specifically for this.
  3. Toiletry items.
  4. Snacks/drinks.
  5. A copy of the birth plan or wishes. It is very important for the person doing labor with you to know your wants and wishes concerning birth. You will likely not be able to fully communicate with staff very well. Unfortunately, this leads many women into birth experiences that they never wanted. Make sure your husband or whoever is supporting you knows how to advocate for you and your baby! (For this reason we highly recommend making sure your support person is included in any birth classes or education you choose to take.)

Everything Your Baby Needs at the Hospital

  1. Two newborn outfits/ one premie outfit, and one 0-3 month outfit.
  2. Socks.
  3. Swaddles.
  4. Diapers and wipes. The hospital will provide this but if you are wanting a specific brand you will want to bring your own.
  5. Bottle/formula. If you are not planning to breastfeed you will need to bring your own formula and bottle. The hospital will have some on hand if you need it. I suggest doing lots of research on formula. Do not just go with what is recommended!
  6. Swaddles. The hospital will provide plenty of swaddles, but let’s be honest- there are definitely cuter/cozier ones out there!
  7. Pacifier. The hospital will give you one on request but if you have a specific brand or type you are wanting to use make sure to bring that.
  8. Car seat. Make sure you bring the car seat if you want to take the baby home!

Have you heard of Earthly Wellness? 
Earthly is a company dedicated to providing only natural, herbal wellness products and supplements for the entire family! My favorite thing about Earthly is that each product quickly and accurately tells if I can use it safely while pregnant and/or nursing. They have everything you need to start your non-toxic, chemical free journey to wellness! Go check them out at the link below and use code LITTLEWIFE10 to enjoy 10% off your first purchase.

Click here to shop!

Other Things to Consider

1. Two phone chargers or a battery pack. Having two separate chargers for you and your support person is a great idea!

2. Photo props/outfits. If you are wanting those cute hospital/fresh 48 pics then do not forget to grab the gear!

3. Your birth plan. This is the most important part of having a positive natural birth experience. Make sure you have a written guide of care for the hospital staff. If your nurses and doctors were as amazing as ours they will do their best to support the plan! You just need to make sure it is available to them. As stated before- make sure your support person is also clued in on the plan!

What the Hospital Will Provide for You

This list may be more specific to *your* hospital but it is definitely worth looking into what is provided by the hospital. You will likely still be paying for it as part of your bill but it is nice knowing what is available to ask for should you need it. Here is everything our hospitals provided during our stay…

  • Diapers and wipes for baby.
  • Paci (on request)
  • Formula
  • Food/vending stations
  • Water in a HUGE cup with a straw
  • Diapers/maxi pads for mom
  • Perineum itch spray
  • Ice pads
  • Heating pad
  • Tuck’s witch hazel pads
  • Popsicles
  • Ice (nice during labor)
  • Baby blankets/swaddles
  • Baby bed
  • Baby bath supplies
  • Gown (highly recommend bringing your own- it is more comfortable)
  • Pillows/blankets
  • Socks
  • Hand pump
  • Nipple ointment
  • Mesh underwear
  • Birthing ball/peanut ball

We hope this has been a helpful guide on your birth journey! Do not forget to add these items to your registry if appropriate.

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Hospital or Home Birth? Why I Chose a Hospital Birth

May 11, 2024

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Disclaimer
This is a series of posts that we have dedicated to new moms who desire a natural birth experience! These posts are not written to sway you one way or another but to simply give our experiences, share information we found useful, and to encourage the safest, best birth for you and your baby!

-Tori and Anna

There are so many things that go into choosing the right birth experience for you and your baby. Here, we are going to go through some reasons why I chose to do a hospital birth over a home birth.

1. I had good options for a hospital birth.

In the area where I live, I am within thirty to forty- five minutes of several highly rated hospitals. I researched them all extensively and made the choice that fit my desires best. Some things I looked for were:

  • Low Cesarean birth rate
  • Offered a birthing tub
  • Had policies that encouraged natural deliveries
  • Offered midwife providers
  • “Rooming In” was standard policy (most hospitals do this, but it’s still better to check just so there are no surprises)
  • Access to wireless monitoring so I could move around
  • NICU (so no transfer in an emergency)

Obviously, you may not be able to have all of your desires met, so pick which things are most important to you. The success of your birth has a lot to do with where you choose, so take time when making this decision and do your research.

Read about Anna’s amazing hospital birth here!

2. Hospitals do not make me nervous.

Some women find a hospital setting very intimidating and unsettling. This will add stress and tension to your delivery, not something we want when trying to birth our little one. I spent a lot of time in hospitals throughout my teenage and young adult life due to chronic health issues. Because of this, I am used to them and honestly find them quite comfortable (weird, I know), so being in one for my delivery was a relief instead of a stress. If you find hospitals scary but aren’t sure about a home birth either, there are a few things I would suggest.

Look into a birth center.

This is the middle ground between home and hospital. Just know you most likely won’t have access to an epidural at a birth center, so no changing your mind.

Bring items that would make your hospital experience more cozy.

You can bring fairy lights, your favorite blanket, battery-operated candles, a diffuser for essential oils, and any other item that could help you feel more at ease during your delivery. Remember, tension is not your friend when trying to give birth. You need your body relaxed.

3. I was hesitant about a home birth.

As I previously stated, you need to be relaxed during labor. If it brings you more stress, then it’s probably not the right decision for you. I am a huge supporter of home births. However, every time I considered one for myself, I just felt very uneasy about it. There is no specific reason why, I just couldn’t get peace about it for me.

4. Birth is messy.

This one is more for fun but was definitely a thought I had while making my decision. I know being a “scrunchy” mama I shouldn’t say this so don’t come for me but, I wasn’t sure I wanted to be scrubbing “the miracle of birth” out of the carpet. And to be totally honest, I thoroughly enjoyed pushing a call button and ordering lunch, having help, and being cleaned up after on those first few days postpartum. Yes, I know midwives, birthing doulas, and postpartum doulas can do all of those things. I’m just sharing what worked well for us.

Have you heard of Earthly Wellness? 
Earthly is a company dedicated to providing only natural, herbal wellness products and supplements for the entire family! My favorite thing about Earthly is that each product quickly and accurately tells if I can use it safely while pregnant and/or nursing. They have everything you need to start your non-toxic, chemical free journey to wellness! Go check them out at the link below and use code LITTLEWIFE10 to enjoy 10% off your first purchase.

Click HERE!

5. I prayed about it.

I didn’t just make a decision based on my own desires. I took all the information I had gathered and bathed it in prayer before The Lord. I asked Him what was best for us, and He answered. In the end, this is the real reason I chose a hospital birth.

Let me remind you that The Lord knows exactly what He is doing. I ended up with sudden preeclampsia and P.R.O.M. It wasn’t known if my baby would need time in the NICU or not. God led us to the right birth at the right hospital, with a NICU team readily available and THE BEST nurses on staff. So before you make your decision, pray about it. There’s a lot of information out there. He can be the calm in the storm of voices and opinions.

I truly feel like the hospital we chose made all the difference in my birth experience. They honored my request to be left alone as much as possible. They were respectful of all my wishes, kind, and truly honored that parents know best. Because of this, I had an amazing hospital birth! Make sure and do your research. Be informed on your choices. A successful natural hospital birth is still possible even if you don’t have access to facilities that encourage it. The choice is yours to make- not theirs.

Written by Anna Bourdess

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What to Do When You Find Out You Are Pregnant

May 3, 2024

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Finding out you are pregnant with your first baby is such an exciting time! It can also be a scary time. So many unknowns, what-ifs, and let’s not even get into allllll the decisions!

That is why me and my long time friend, fellow mom, and co-writer Anna Bourdess have decided to do a series of posts on “What to Do…” throughout your first pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. These posts are formulated to be a simple, informative, and practical guide to your journey into motherhood.

When we first found out we were expecting, one thing that we for sure did not expect was how much information there is on pregnancy and all things baby. To say it is overwhelming seems like an understatement! Everyone has an opinion about this topic. We do not wish to be another voice out there saying what you need to or should do. Our purpose in these posts is to give first time mamas a quiet, peaceful place filled with encouragement, resources, and USEFUL information.

If you have any questions we would love to help you navigate this exciting, scary, and wonderful season of life with you! We are not experts but we have been there.

Here’s to momming in the 2020s!

The Most Life-Changing Word: Positive

You just found out you are pregnant! By now you have probably taken that first test, and another test, and maybe (if you are a reluctant believer), another test. Who knew that one little word could hold so much emotion- POSITIVE. Whether this is a complete surprise or you have been trying for many months/years can we just take this moment to tell you congratulations!

Motherhood is such a precious joy. You are about to enter a new season of life that will change you forever! You will never be the same person you were before becoming a mama, and all for the better.

After the high/exciting emotions begin to settle you may be left feeling like, “What do I do next?”. This is totally normal. Many of us spend lots of time and energy focusing on getting pregnant but not necessarily researching what to do when it happens. Now that you have that positive result you may be a bit overwhelmed by all the swirling opinions of online articles, family, and friends.

The first thing to do- breathe. You have forty weeks (with some exceptions) to enjoy this sweet little person growing inside you. Your body was made to carry this baby and you can raise him/her well. You’ve got this, mama!

Setting Up Your First Appointment

After that pause, the next thing you need to be working on is scheduling your first appointment- also called a confirmation appointment. Here’s everything you can expect at that first appointment…

  • This appointment will likely be scheduled around eight weeks after your last period date. This can be frustrating because for eight whole weeks you may be wondering, “I am actually pregnant?”. If you have taken a reliable test, a second test a few days later, and begin to have symptoms of pregnancy (nausea, headaches, exhaustion, etc.) you can rest assured that you are likely pregnant!
  • First they will likely want to test your urine for HcG and protein. This will confirm that you are pregnant and that all of your levels are normal.
  • They will run routine check on your overall health such as blood pressure and weight at every check up.
  • Most offices will then do a vaginal ultrasound to make sure everything is looking healthy. If your baby is old enough at this check up you may be able to hear his/her heart beat. The baby will probably look like just a blob right now but it will be the sweetest blog you have ever seen!
  • You will likely meet one of the doctors in the practice to go through any discomfort or concerns you may have. This will be the time to let them know if you have any questions/concerns about the first trimester. You can even interview them at this time to see if the doctor/care group is a right fit for you but do not worry if you are not ready to do this quite yet- you will have plenty of time!

Finding Your Provider

Finding a provider that respects your values, has time for your questions, and makes you feel safe is so important! Here are a few things to consider when you begin your search…

Do you want a midwife or an OBGYN? This is a good place to start. Both come in many types and forms! Some midwives work under the umbrella of a hospital birth setting, while some only perform deliveries in home. Some have certain degrees/certifications and some do not. We will not go into all the details here so be sure to do your own research. However, the one main difference I have seen between an OB and midwives is the level of care and connection. If you are a more direct, to the point type person just here to get the job done you may appreciate the OB more than us slightly skeptical, questioning ladies who need that connection with our care provider.

Free Printable! Long press the image (iPhone) to save to your device/print.

If you are looking to have a natural birth another great resource is looking at the c-section rates of the providers you are interested in. (You can find this information here!) If the rates are high you might want to take this into consideration.

Once you choose or if you already have and OB-GYN look up their c-section rates and the hospital where they will deliver. This is crucial to your birthing experience.

-Anna

Are they in network/budget? After narrowing it down to a few providers you are interested in check to see if they are within network if you have insurance. If you do not have insurance or you are using a midwife for a home birth you need to get a full breakdown of the cost per visit. This may sound overwhelming but it is a great way to eliminate your options.

Do they align with your values? They may not agree with you about how they like their coffee but you need to KNOW that your care provider has your best interest in mind. If you want a natural, unmedicated birth but your provider wants to induce every woman that comes into her office chances of your natural, unmedicated birth begin to fly out of the window. Regardless of if your provider says they will respect your wishes, you need to know that they will no matter what! Ask their opinion on unmedicated labor/delivery. Let them know up front what your expectations are. You are hiring them to work for you, not for you to mindlessly go along with what they say and pay the bill!

Remember you can always change your provider later on if you feel uncomfortable at any time or visit. If you are going through a network or care group you may be able to request certain OBs or NPs for appointments but you will likely be left to whoever is on call for your delivery.

Your providers are there to serve you. You can fire them if you do not like the care they are providing and get someone who is a better fit.

-Anna

Focus on Your Nutrition

Everything you do from now on not only effects you but it will effect your baby. The weight of that responsibility can seem so overwhelming at times but it starts here- everyday making the right choices for you and your little one! And it truly is simple (don’t overcomplicate it girl!).

Prenatals

Start your pregnancy off with good nutrition in the form of a QUALITY prenatal vitamin (a few of my favorites are linked below to help start your search). By quality I mean if it is in the form of a gummy and has 34 grams of added sugar….probably junk it!

  • Pure Synergy Prenatal
  • Mary Ruth Organics Liquid Prenatal (may be a good option if you cannot stomach a pill)
  • Ritual Prenatal

You can start taking a prenatal right away. Personally I (Tori) stay on prenatals and likely will until I am done having babies. They are great to continue throughout postpartum. I highly recommend finding a good quality vitamin. I used the gummy junk ones my first pregnancy and noticed a big difference in my overall health with my second baby when I took a good vitamin.

Healthy Eating Habits

That prenatal is great but if you are not eating well your body will feel sluggish and you will likely be missing something you and the baby need. Here are a few tips to remember when it comes to food throughout your pregnancy…

  • Protein. As Americans we are all very protein deficient. We eat well below the recommended serving for a day. While pregnant (unless told otherwise by your healthcare provider) try to shoot for around 80 grams of protein daily. If you are dealing with morning sickness and nausea protein is a game changer. You also may find that when you are nauseous the last thing you want is protein. Try to get as much as you can in any form your stomach can handle. (Good sources of protein: meat, eggs, cheese, yogurt, nuts, protein shakes, etc.)
  • Fruits and Vegetables. This seems obvious but you will definitely need to stay up on the fruits and veggies. Dark green and leafy vegetables are an especially good source of iron and other nutrients you need while pregnant. Avocados are another very nutrient dense food to add to the list of pregnancy must haves. Berries are great and when added to a smoothie you may be able to stomach them better than eating them during the first trimester.
  • Eat what you can eat. If you find that EVERYTHING is making you nauseous, just eat what you can eat. Even if it is not healthy. You are far better off to eat a slice of pizza that does not make you rush to the bathroom than to throw up every meal or simply not eat anything at all. More than likely your nausea will subside going into the second trimester and you will have more time to focus on getting nutritional foods. If you are having trouble to the point that nothing is staying down let your provider know and they may offer medication to help ease your symptoms. Eating little and often (small snacks every couple hours) can really help get food in you without overloading your fragile system. Hang in there!

I wish I would have made more of an effort to make the best choices to fuel my body. Make sure you are giving your body the best you can, growing a baby is hard work!

-Anna

Weight Gain

Some women are concerned about their weight-gain during pregnancy to the point of obsession. Can we just take a moment and say- you are growing a WHOLE HUMAN inside you and you are going to gain weight! It is normal and it is okay. If you are eating decently healthy and staying active you do not need to be overwhelmed by the numbers on the scale.

Getting Through to that First Appointment

The first trimester for some is full of the hardest weeks of pregnancy. Here are a few things you can expect to experience during the weeks leading up to your first appointment and into the second trimester…

  • nausea/vomiting (known as morning sickness but can happen any time of day)
  • headaches
  • extreme fatigue
  • mood swings
  • cramping (light cramping like a period is normal; intense and very painful cramping is not normal and you should talk to your doctor about this BEFORE your eight week appointment)

With all this and maybe even more going on (hormones are CRAZY!!) you may be wanting to reach into the medicine cabinet for some relief….but you need to be careful. Many medications are not safe to take while pregnant and can harm your baby. Your doctor will likely give you a complete list of medications that are safe to take while pregnant but until then it can be scary trying to navigate what is safe. Below is a list of medications/herbs that are safe for most women to take while pregnant (if you have any medical problems please do your own research or speak to a doctor). They are also things that Anna and I took during our pregnancies…

  • Tylenol (this is the only pain reliever/fever reducer deemed safe at this time. It is highly recommended to avoid ibuprofen.)
  • Peppermint tea/oil for nausea and vomiting
  • Earthley Feel Better Fast for colds, upset stomach, and fevers
  • Earthley Cough B Gone for coughs and sore throat
  • Ginger tea/gummies for nausea and vomiting

Have you heard of Earthly Wellness? 
Earthly is a company dedicated to providing only natural, herbal wellness products and supplements for the entire family! My favorite thing about Earthly is that each product quickly and accurately tells if I can use it safely while pregnant and/or nursing. They have everything you need to start your non-toxic, chemical free journey to wellness! Go check them out at the link below and use code LITTLEWIFE10 to enjoy 10% off your first purchase.

Click Here

You will want to stop all other medications that are not safe for pregnancy. Speak to your family doctor about what you need to take/not take during the first weeks before your confirmation appointment.

Read this post on How to Make it Through the First Trimester.

Take the Nap

One major part of pregnancy is the fatigue. Anna and I are both homemakers and had the luxury of napping throughout the day as needed. From the homemaker standpoint there can be a lot guilt associated with being “lazy” all day. Your husband is out working and here you are falling asleep in a pile of laundry!

After two pregnancies myself my biggest piece of advice for the first trimester is just take the nap. Do what you can but when you are exhausted allow yourself that rest. You will likely never get to sleep like you can before you have that first baby!

You are not being lazy- your body is making a person! In the second trimester you will likely get your energy back, and then some.

If you can, take the nap! This is your first baby, you will NEVER be able to sleep like this again. Just take the nap!

Conclusion

As crazy as the first trimester can be try to relax and enjoy it. When you are having a hard day let your mind wander to the fun baby things like nursery decor, baby names, etc. It can feel like forever but the first trimester will not last long. Most women begin to feel more like themselves around the twelve or thirteen week mark. If you do not that is okay too! Your body is doing amazing things- have some grace with yourself.

If we can help you in any way please reach out on our contact page or drop a comment below!

Co-written by Tori Ruckman & Anna Bourdess

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Sourdough Breadsticks Recipe: Simple and Quick Breadsticks From Scratch

May 1, 2024

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These sourdough breadsticks are quick and easy to make- so soft and buttery with a hint of garlic. This recipe can be long fermented or made quickly for convenience with active starter or discard. Learn all about how to make them in this post…

soft and easy sourdough discard breadsticks

Benefits of Sourdough Breadsticks

You might be here wondering- what in the world is up with all the sourdough things? First, you are seeing it everywhere because it’s the trendy thing! However, more importantly, a lot of us are here for benefits far beyond a trend…

Health Benefits of Sourdough

I could honestly write an entire post on this subject but here are just a few of the benefits of sourdough and why I personally choose it over yeast 99% of the time…

  • The breakdown of gluten. When you bake with sourdough the process of fermentation- long or short- breaks down the glutens far better than modified yeast products. This means your body is also able to break it down even better. Often those with gluten sensitivity and intolerance are able to eat sourdough.
  • The natural probiotics. The probiotic content in sourdough is so good for your gut! I decided that if I am making my own bread (or anything for that matter) I might as well get the most benefits out of it. The best thing about the probiotics in sourdough is that they are so easy on the digestive system.
  • Thoughtful ingredients. One of my favorite benefits of the sourdough world is that, often, when you are putting time and energy into a food you are much more likely to use quality ingredients. For example- I refuse to use bleached flour in anything! When it comes to my sourdough I am especially picky and choose to use only quality flour.

When it comes to sourcing quality ingredients I can trust at an affordable price- Thrive Market is my one stop grocery shop! Thrive offers thousands of non-toxic, clean label products from hundreds of trusted brands. There are no order minimums, monthly spending limits, and your subscription is completely customizable. Want to learn more and get up to $60 in free groceries? Click the link below!

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Converting This to an All-Purpose Recipe

This recipe could be termed an “all-purpose” recipe. You can make this dough for any pizza/bread type side recipe. Here are a few ideas…

  • Pizza crust
  • Garlic knots
  • Cheese sticks
  • Pizza bombs
  • Pepperoni bites

If you are wanting to turn a pizza or side bread recipe into a sourdough recipe simply substitute the dough for this recipe below and add whatever other ingredients are required.

earthly wellness ad

Have you heard of Earthly Wellness? 
Earthly is a company dedicated to providing only natural, herbal wellness products and supplements for the entire family! My favorite thing about Earthly is that each product quickly and accurately tells if I can use it safely while pregnant and/or nursing. They have everything you need to start your non-toxic, chemical free journey to wellness! Go check them out at the link below and use code LITTLEWIFE10 to enjoy 10% off your first purchase.

Click here to Shop!

Sourdough Breadsticks with Discard vs Active Starter

These breadsticks can be made with either discard or active starter- whichever you have on hand! I have tried to test both and see if there is a difference and honestly they taste exactly the same. The texture of the ones made with active starter were just a bit more fluffy. Both were delicious!

Sourdough Breadsticks Ingredients

The ingredients for these breadsticks are simple and stress free!

  • 1 cup sourdough starter active or discard
  • 1 cup warm water
  • 1/4 cup honey or sugar
  • 2 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 3 cups all-purpose flour
  • 2 cloves garlic
  • 3 tbsp melted butter
  • garlic salt, optional

Substitutions for Sourdough Breadsticks

Honey and sugar. The sweetener is completely optional for this recipe. I found that it gives them a good flavor with a bit added but it is not necessary.

Baking powder. If you are using active, fresh fed starter it is not necessary to use baking powder. It simply softens and helps the breadsticks rise when discard (or less active) starter is used.

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soft and easy sourdough discard breadsticks

Sourdough Discard Breadsticks

An all-purpose bread dough recipe for breadsticks, pizza crust, garlic knots, and more.
Print Recipe Pin Recipe
Prep Time 1 hour hr 35 minutes mins
Cook Time 15 minutes mins
Total Time 1 hour hr 50 minutes mins
Servings: 15 sticks
Course: Appetizer, bread, Pizza, Side Dish
Ingredients Method Notes

Ingredients
  

  • 1 cup sourdough starter active or discard
  • 1 cup warm water
  • 1/4 cup honey or sugar
  • 2 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 3 cups all-purpose flour
  • 2 cloves garlic
  • 3 tbsp melted butter
  • garlic salt optional

Method
 

  1. Combine starter and water. Allow to sit about 5 minutes, then stir.
  2. Add honey, baking powder, salt, and flour.
  3. Knead until smooth. The dough may be a bit sticky.
  4. Let the dough rise for one hour. SEE NOTE #1.
  5. Roll dough out on to floured surface.
  6. Shape however you desire. For spiral technique follow the instructions below.
  7. FOR SPIRAL SHAPE: Cut rolled out dough into 1 1/2-2 inch sections. Cut with a pizza cutter through the center of the section of dough almost all the way. Leave just a bit at the top of your cut (SEE PHOTO). Twist the parts together. Pinch the ends to keep them in tact.
  8. After shaping, place on a greased pan and allow to rise for 30 minutes.
  9. While dough is rising, melt butter and add finely chopped garlic. Brush the mixture on the breadsticks before baking. (I also add a bit of garlic salt.)
  10. Bake at 350℉ for 12-15 minutes or until tops start to brown. Top with additional garlic butter after baking.

Notes

NOTE ONE: You may skip this step however it may result in slightly more dense and sour tasting breadsticks. 
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Want to learn more about mastering sourdough? Get my Beginner’s Guide to Simple Sourdough over in the shop! This mini digital guide is perfect for beginners and a great reference tool for experienced sourdough bakers to have on hand. Click the link below to get your copy and check out other items we have in the shop!

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Three Positive Birth Stories: A Collection of Natural Birth Stories

April 18, 2024

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All birth is beautiful! Hospital, home birth, unmedicated, medicated, c-section. However your baby made is earth-side- you did an amazing job!

One of my favorite things about birth is that each story is so unique and every experience is different. I think the one piece of advice to gather from these stories is that no matter what you are planning for- medicated or unmedicated, you need to be prepared for anything.

We hope these stories help you prepare for whatever wonderful birth you have!

#1: Jenna Rae: An Unmedicated Positive Hospital Birth Story

Our sweet baby girl was born on September 21, 2022. At the time of writing this she is six weeks exactly. Time is flying by but boy are we having fun! 

I always dreamed of being a mama. Even as a little girl. In my teen years I never really had any dreams or ambitions of a career. The desire of my heart was to be a wife and mother. As amazing as I thought this life would be it does not begin to compare to the reality of a life lived for Jesus and allowing Him to fulfill the desires of your heart! To sum it all up, I feel extremely blessed!

But you are here for a birth story! so back to that. 

Jenna’s birth story could be a bit lengthy so I will try to keep as many unnecessary details out as possible. 

To fully understand we have to go back a bit further than the beginning of labor to our thirty two week ultrasound where we were told that Jenna was measuring a bit on the small side. Our doctor was not very concerned considering my husband and I were both relatively small babies (in the seven pound range). As well as the fact that I am a small built person. 

They had us come back every week for an ultrasound just to make sure things were going well and she was continuing to grow at a steady rate. 

Our Thirty-Eight Week Appointment

Things continued to go well until our thirty-eight week ultrasound. Jenna continued measuring small but maintained a steady growth rate until the week before at thirty-seven weeks. She was not dangerously low, just not gaining as much as the doctor would like. Everything else about her looked great. 

When performing a growth scan, the ultrasound technician measures a baby’s head circumference, abdomen, and length of femur. At Jenna’s thirty-eight week appointment they noticed her head and femur were growing consistently but her abdominal measurements were bringing her percentile down. She had dropped from the seventh percentile to less than one percent in just a week. 

The reason for this was that my placenta was no longer giving her what she needed to grow (this was likely due to an abnormal placement of the umbilical cord). Instead of her nutrients coming from my body she was having to use her own fat storage to provide for her development. Because of this it was decided that she would be better off out than in and I should be induced as soon as possible (the following morning). 

Most people would probably not find this a big deal since voluntary inductions happen all the time at thirty eight weeks. However, I did not want to be induced at all! This was a LOT to process at once. I actually low-key had a mental break down in the doctor’s office!

I think it was mainly due to my lack of preparing for the unexpected. Everything in my pregnancy had gone according to text-book and had been extremely easy up to this point (minus major sleep issues my entire pregnancy!). We knew she was small but everyone kept assuring us that she was likely fine. My plan was to labor at home as long as I could, go to the hospital, and have my child naturally if I could handle the pain. This was a lot of information to take in. I did not realize until this point how secure I was in my own plans. 

The doctor was extremely kind and patient. She explained all the reasons for the induction being necessary. She respected my decision to have my child naturally and offered to try breaking my water to let my body go into labor on its own without having to use Pitocin. 

By the time we left I had peace in abundance, even though I was still not thrilled with this interruption of my plans! 

The Surprises Kept Coming. 

This was not the last time Jenna would surprise us that day. 

After leaving the doctor’s office, my husband and I called our parents to inform them of what was happening. Both sets said they would just pray I went into labor that evening on my own. 

We headed out to Cheddar’s where my husband got us a quiet table in the back and we splurged on one last pre-baby meal. After our mini date we headed home to get prepared to be at the hospital at 6am. We packed hospital bags, set up the carseat, and I stress cleaned a few things then headed to bed. 

Once in bed I started having a few contractions. I was used to having Braxton Hick’s contractions throughout pregnancy so I was not too concerned. Except they started coming more strongly and more regularly than before. I figured maybe it was just from the stress of the day and tried to relax. 

By around two in the morning things had not changed at all, in fact I was more uncomfortable than when I laid down. Then I heard a strange sound. A few women had told me how they actually heard their water break. I was in denial! I only heard something, I did not feel any fluid. I decided I would get up and use the bathroom. I took a few steps and then came the fluid. It still was not more than a few drops but I was no longer in denial. This was it! Prayer worked! 

I woke Jimmy up and began to try timing the contractions that were now much stronger. They were not extremely painful, just uncomfortable and very irregular. I could not even time them because they were so inconsistent. I remembered my mom saying that she could never go by contractions to indicate where she was at for any of her labors. 

The doctor had checked my cervix earlier that day at my appointment and I was already dilated to a three. Because of this we decided it would probably be a good idea to go to the hospital instead of waiting it out at home and risk having Jenna in the car. A lot can happen in a twenty minute drive and this kid had been full of surprises already! Again, my plans were interrupted. 

Active Labor

We made it to the hospital just fine around 3:30am. We got checked in and the nurse asked us her million questions then left us for a bit to “rest”. (I love how they leave your room in a hospital and tell you to try to get some rest then people keep coming in the room every ten minutes!)

Jimmy was able to sleep some and I just “rested” for a while. 

At this point I was dilated at a four and eighty percent effaced. My pain level was around a two for the majority of my labor until transition. Contractions were quite uncomfortable but very manageable. 

To be honest, I really enjoy contractions. Each one is a challenge to stay relaxed and in control. When you picture what is going on and how your body is working to bring that little life into the world can be pretty amazing!

The day drug on uneventfully the whole morning and afternoon. My contractions were getting stronger and more intense but the pain was still very manageable. I was GBS positive so by the afternoon they had already been able to administer several bags antibiotics via IV to decrease risk of infection and possible harm to baby. The baby’s heart rate remained great the entire labor and we were sailing along beautifully. 

Transition

By around four o’clock in the afternoon I began to switch from active labor to transition. My pain at this point was around a six or seven during contractions and I was finding it much harder to relax through the pain. Breathing became different as well. I had to really change up my whole strategy to remain in control. 

Before transition I found that counter pressure was very helpful. My husband would gently press in on my lower back during a contraction. Even at the beginning of transition this was working until I was in full transition. At this point it was no longer relieving. 

By around five o’clock I was exhausted. My face, neck, and arms were numb from lack of oxygen due to not breathing correctly. The nurse said I was low-key hyperventilating and needed to try to breathe longer and deeper through my contractions. I was dilated at a seven and at this point I was very much done! 

I remember feeling like I was not going to be able to do this. I knew if I was going to make it the rest of the way without medication or just giving up from exhaustion I needed to do something to regain control. I asked my doctor if I could take a shower. I honestly do not know why I thought of this but I am so glad I did! She was hesitantly fine with it. I am pretty sure I was freaking the nurses out. One of them decided to stay in the room and leave the bathroom door cracked in case I started to go into labor. 

I made it through the shower just fine and it helped immensely! It was just what I needed to boost my energy and help me refocus during that last leg of the journey. 

By around seven the shifts had changed and I got the best nurse! They were all really great but this particular one was a mom of seven who had all of her children naturally/unmedicated. She gave some great tips! 

From seven o’clock to nearly eight I remained dilated at a nine. I was so close to a ten but I had just a small piece of cervix that was not fully expanded. Talk about discouraging being that close but not able to just be done!

The pain and pressure were building intensely. My nurse said that when things were ready I should feel a pressure like I had not felt before, almost like the need to poop. While I was waiting on this magical pressure, she prepared the room and my mind for delivery.

This was a big help to keep me focused. It made me feel like I knew what I was doing, even though I had no clue! As she was explaining that I would push for ten seconds three times, then take a break I was wondering if I would have enough air and energy to push ten whole seconds. (You seriously think of the strangest things during labor!) Because I was so concerned that I would not be able to do it I decided I should practice. I waited for a contraction and lightly pushed/held my breath for ten seconds. I could do it!! 

After my practice push I felt that unbelievable pressure the nurse described. We called her back into the room and after a final cervical check she said I was complete and it was time to push. I was so energized and relieved!

When the doctor came in I clearly remember her saying, “This could take anywhere from thirty minutes to three hours.”. I just remember looking at the clock (8:02pm) and thinking to myself “There is no way I’m pushing three hours! This baby is out of here by nine o’clock!”. 

I pushed for twenty minutes and after eighteen hours of labor our precious girl was born at 8:28pm. 

There is nothing like the feeling of a long awaited treasure placed on your chest! Instant love beyond description. 

Jenna weighed five pounds eight ounces and was seventeen inches long. She is a healthy baby girl, still tiny but so quickly making up for it! 

I can not wait to see where life takes us! Already so many memories have been made and so many lessons have been learned through the blessing of you. Welcome to the world sweet Jenna Rae.

#2 Jackson Keith: An All-Natural Positive Hospital Birth Story

To understand our birth story a little better let me tell you about the weeks leading up to Jackson’s arrival. My pregnancy had been almost seamless up until 35 weeks. I had some pretty severe morning sickness the whole time, but, beyond that things had gone very well. 

At 35 weeks my blood pressure suddenly spiked. After visiting with my midwife and some testing, I was informed that I had, with no warning, developed preeclampsia. We weighed through together the benefits and risks of each decision and we decided that it would be best to try and get me to 37 weeks and then we would induce. I was put on bedrest and monitored my blood pressure closely at home. We ended up in the hospital twice before delivering Jackson, due to blood pressure spikes. 

PROM (premature rupture of membranes) 

Scheduled for induction the following Thursday, I woke up around four o’clock in the morning on that Sunday, to discover my water had broken. Only, I didn’t realize that’s what had happened. For me, it wasn’t like a movie scene where a huge gush of fluid splashes to the floor. It was more like a leaky faucet, and as any mama will tell you that feeling is pretty common those last months of pregnancy. Not realizing what was happening, I later went back to sleep and awoke to the same feeling around seven. By now I was suspicious. 

My husband, Philip, had gone to do bus route and church that morning but, I had informed him of what I thought was going on and asked him to keep his phone close. At this point that “faucet” I mentioned earlier had sprung a few more leaks and I was feeling a lot of pressure, making it difficult to sit comfortably. Contractions started around nine and slowly increased in frequency and intensity but still very manageable. I called Philip at ten and suggested he come home. By the time he got there, things were picking up. Let me just pause here and say how thankful I am for my husband. He did amazing and I could not have had the birth experience I did without his support. 

We eventually make it to the hospital and they run all of their tests to confirm that I am actually in labor. My triage nurse was phenomenal. She explained everything she was going to do and asked permission for it all. I consented to a cervical exam and we found out I was at three centimeters dilation and eighty percent effaced. You don’t have to have cervical exams if you don’t want to, it’s completely your choice. Just remember, they typically don’t mean much as far as your progress goes. Things can change quickly with your progress or you could stall out. Every person’s body is different and each time can be different so don’t get consumed with your numbers. 

I desired greatly to have a natural, unmedicated delivery and tried my best in prayer and preparation to have the greatest chance of that happening. Once we were in a room, a nurse began bringing in a bag of Pitocin, to which I had not consented at the time. I politely declined and we tried some natural methods to progress my labor. At this time I was having consistent contractions, but they weren’t getting closer together or intensifying anymore. A few hours later, Philip and I discussed the risks versus benefits of beginning the Pitocin and decided it would be best to start the Pitocin to try and progress my labor. I could have delayed it longer, the risk was not high, it’s just what we felt was best for myself and baby at that time.

I had originally planned to be very mobile during labor and also use a birthing tub once at a certain point. Due to the preeclampsia, it was asked that I be monitored constantly which wasn’t a part of my plan, however, at the time I found it easier for me to be calm through my labor while listening to Jackson’s heartbeat, so I agreed. My nurses knew I desired to be up and moving and so kindly brought in a portable monitor since I wasn’t a candidate for wireless monitoring due to Jackson coming early. This allowed me as much mobility as possible, which greatly helped me manage my contractions. 

Beginning the Pitocin 

My nurse and I decided upping the Pitocin at half the usual rate would work best for my body. Since I was already showing signs of progression, we just wanted to give my body a little boost. Within thirty minutes of starting the Pitocin, things were progressing forward again. Since I couldn’t use the tub due to monitoring, I had to use other things in my arsenal of pain management. I brought several options since I didn’t know what I’d prefer. I ended up using a labor comb, and birthing ball the most. I had also practiced breathing techniques which were such a big part of my pain management. Philip was amazing in helping me achieve the unmedicated birth I desired. He was constantly giving counter pressure (which felt amazing), telling me how proud he was of me, and reminding me to relax my body and breath down. 

Transition 

After being on the Pitocin for a few hours, I requested a cervical exam again. To my dismay, I had only progressed to 4 cm. This is why I stated previously to not get focused on the numbers. Things can change fast, and they did for me. We pushed the Pitocin up slightly, one more time, and within 30 minutes my contractions were much more intense than they had been before. I was no longer able to speak at all through them and had entered “labor land” as many mamas have called it. Focusing on nothing but breathing and low moaning through each one. 

I had been doing well with the mental game of labor but I hit a point of exhaustion and lost some of the control I had worked so hard to keep. My low moans turned into growls and became much louder than before. More like a grizzly bear if I’m being honest. At this point my nurse had come in when the next contraction hit. She saw me bare down and urged me to resist that feeling to push because if my cervix wasn’t dilated enough it would swell and birth would be much more difficult. I told her my body was doing that and I had no control. Stunned she said “Oh! would it be ok for me to check you again?” I agreed and she did a cervical exam. She leaped off the table and told me how proud she was of me and that I was doing it! I had gone from 4cm to 10cm in thirty minutes and we were about to have a baby!

Delivery

 Contractions were hitting back to back and at this point Philip was growing uneasy seeing me in so much pain, not knowing how to help ease it anymore. He said he was praying in his heart “Lord, I really wish Anna’s mom was here, she would know what to do”. He looked up and guess who was standing at the door? He said he mouthed “help me” across the room to her. I hate I missed that because it’s still hilarious to me that my husband needed my mommy for my birth. 

We had originally planned for it to be just Philip and I, but I’m thankful my mom got to be in there. It was special. During all this, contractions are still hitting back to back and the nurse is calmly but repeatedly calling for the doctor knowing we don’t have long before this baby is here. The doctor made it in the room and barely got his gloves on when Jackson made his appearance. By now, he had triggered the fetal ejection reflex and in two pushes he was here. In Philip’s description it wasn’t a delivery, I launched him.

I heard that perfect little cry and they laid him on my chest while Philip laid above my head and sobbed. That will forever be one of my most precious memories. We did delayed cord clamping and his Daddy cut the cord when it was time. With him being early we weren’t sure what he would need so a NICU team was on stand by in the room. Originally, my plan was an hour of undisturbed skin to skin, however, with him being a preemie we knew he needed to be checked out quickly, especially his breathing. Once the cord was cut, I handed him to the nurses to be checked out and Philip followed to ensure all our wishes were honored. No eye goop, no shots, just checked, measured, weighed, and right back to mama if all was well. Praise The Lord it was, my little early boy was perfect in every way, to all the staff’s amazement and spent the next several hours getting all the snuggles. In fact, he’s still getting all the snuggles. 

Although everything about my birth wasn’t exactly how I had planned, I am still so happy with our birth story. Of course all that matters is a healthy baby, but having a no or low intervention birth was extremely important to me. I’m so thankful that The Lord heard that prayer and granted the natural delivery I desired. 

#3 Joanna Faith: An Unmedicated Positive Home Birth Story

I’ve been out enjoying all the baby snuggles the past five weeks and can I just say, I LOVE the newborn stage! I’m trying to soak up every minute I can. It goes by way too fast! 

If you’ve been here a while you know that I like to document my birth stories here. For two reasons, one being for myself— I always want to remember the details! The other reason is to encourage new mamas to at very least *attempt* a natural, unmediated birth. It’s also just fun to read or hear birth stories! 

Whatever brought you to this post, I’m glad you’re here! Thanks for reading. I post a new blog every week about homemaking, real food recipes, and mom life. You can subscribe to the blog for post updates. We’re also on Instagram as @littlewifeinthewoods. 

Now let’s get into that birth story! 

Why we chose homebirth

I have always wanted to have a homebirth, as much as I have always wanted to be a mom! As a little girl it fascinated me. (I was basically an eight year old granny— I liked growing herbs, baking, and babies…not much has changed!) 

In my late teens, due to some chronic health issues caused by a vaccine, then the pandemic in 2020, I have zero faith in the medical system. Don’t get me wrong, I think doctors are great, nurses are fantastic, and hospitals are sometimes necessary! However, I just do not see the need personally if your pregnancy is healthy and things are going well. Especially if you want an environment conducive to a natural laboring/birthing experience. 

(TIMEOUT: I am in no way becoming a homebirth advocate! I truly believe the way you have your babies is between you, your husband, and God. And there is NO wrong way to have a baby— medicated, unmedicated. Hospital or home. A healthy baby is all that matters.) 

My firstborn was birthed in the hospital and it was a great experience. I just do not enjoy the system. I truly feel unsafe in the hospital/medical environment. I do not know if I can even explain that to someone who doesn’t know what that feels like. The best way I know how is that I just do not trust any of the system or process. 

Another huge reason was that financially it just made more sense for our family. I wanted a homebirth with our first but my husband was just very uncomfortable with the idea…until we got that hospital bill back after we had her!! 

I had a completely natural labor and delivery in the hospital. Other than being constantly monitored (which I hated!!) I did 90% of all the work involved in getting this child here. So why they were charging more than six months of mortgage payments I’ll never understand! But they did! 

Homebirth monitoring

Some would say it’s a completely careless decision. And you’re allowed to feel that way. I have complete confidence in my decision— now more than ever, so these opinions really don’t bother me. 

However, I do want to clarify that trained and experienced midwives highly monitor your health and the health of your baby throughout pregnancy. Each visit all vitals are checked, baby’s heart rate, positioning of the baby, and swelling is addressed. Routine checks for protein in the urine, blood pressure, and any abnormalities or discomforts are addressed. I do not have time to explain how much more helpful my midwives were throughout my pregnancy than doctor’s previously! They just had so many more tricks up their sleeve to help make pregnancy as comfortable and natural as possible! 

Laboring at Home

I still love those words. At Home. 

There is nothing more comforting, peaceful, and natural than laboring at home. I did not get this opportunity with my first. My water broke and I was basically told to come running to the hospital where I labored for about 18 hours. 

The home laboring experience was so special. It began around 4:30am Monday morning after another exhausting night of no sleep. If you have had a baby you know about the skepticism surrounding labor…is it really labor? Could be false labor? might be real? You never know until you know! 

My contractions did not stop when I changed positions so I figured it was a good sign but decided to get in the bath to make sure they didn’t go away before I woke my husband up. They didn’t! I sat in there a while, then decided to eat something since it would probably be a long day. 

I woke Jimmy up around 6 to let him know he wouldn’t be going to work. Then we got busy making sure everything was ready. 

I had prepared as much as I could in the weeks leading up to birth. My first came at 38 weeks so I definitely wanted everything ready and organized just in case. The only things we had to do was make our bed and take a few things out of our bedroom to fit the birth tub. 

We also let our midwife know when contractions were consistently seven minutes apart for about an hour. She would be aware and close but let us labor undisturbed until they were three minutes apart, lasting one minute or more, consistently for an hour. 

With all the things done we just waited! 

I was able to get a little rest in the hours of early labor. As things started to ramp up I began to change positions trying to stay comfortable while also making progress. This was so fun! In the hospital my movement was very limited so I did not get to experiment with different positions. 

I went from bed, to pacing, to birth ball, to leaning over the bed and each place/position provided relief in different ways! 

While I was laboring Jimmy was working! It was Monday and if you’ve been here a while you know my house is so bad on Mondays I do this thing called a Monday reset! This Monday was no exception. He jumped right in there cleaning, taking care of the toddler, and making frequent visits to check on me. He was amazing!! 

Transition 

Around 1:30 pm things started to really ramp up. I knew from last time that my body had hit transition. I could not get comfortable anywhere but bed and even the slightest movement would bring a contraction, even if I’d just finished one! 

I decided it was time to start timing contractions. They were about three to three and a half minutes apart and lasted right at two minutes each. My midwife decided it was time to hit the road! 

She got to us around 2:45pm. She checked on me and baby and everything was great! She did such a great job at keeping everything calm and quiet. 

The next little while things just kept progressing and getting more intense. I tried to focus on relaxing through each contraction and letting my body do the work. While there definitely was pain, I was still able to keep control of my breathing and mostly relax (although I still couldn’t fully conquer it…guess I’ll have to try again next time!).

As the pressure intensified I had a massive contraction and my water finally broke! This felt so relieving and intense all at the same time. 

By now Mrs. Midwife and my husband were very busy getting the birth tub inflated and filled. I had not definitely planned on birthing in water but wanted to try it, mostly out of curiosity. I had heard it really relieved a lot of pain and I was not disappointed! 

The only issue was that by the time they set the tub up and started to fill it my body had already said, “Time to push!”. The birth tub has to be filled to a certain point and we were not quite there. My midwife asked if she should keep filling the tub or just leave it. I opted to keep trying for the tub because why not!

Delivery

The tub finally made it to minimum water capacity for a safe delivery so after the next contraction we very carefully transitioned me to the water. It was somewhere close to about 4:00pm this point. I could feel that she was SO CLOSE! 

After a few minutes in the tub a contraction hit and I felt that urge to push. My midwife had encouraged me to just listen to my body. If I needed to push, push. If I just felt like I needed a break then do so and just let my body do the work. This was a much different experience from my delivery in the hospital but very much appreciated! 

Here’s where it gets interesting…

So maybe around my third or fourth push we START to have a baby! Feet first. 

Yep! I looked down and there were two little feet. If you don’t know, babies are supposed to come head first. 

Now before you get all distressed about this, let’s remember. My midwife highly monitored baby’s position at the end of pregnancy. At 39 weeks we were very low, head down, and in optimal position to have a baby! It is very unlikely for a baby to completely change position that far in. 

Unless you’re Joanna! I truly believe I felt her flip during the morning hours of early labor. She was moving quite a lot and I distinctly remember a big movement that almost hurt. I’m 99% sure this is when she flipped. 

So with feet just dangling, we sat there waiting for another contraction for what seemed like forever! Everyone stayed very calm which kept me calm and focused. We just waited, giving my body time to do what it needed to do. 

I’m not sure if my uterus just thought it was done but this next contraction took a while to get here! If you’ve ever had a baby you know that once you deliver the head/shoulders the rest of the baby just kind of plops out. This does not happen when your baby is footling breech. My mind went there first. I just remember thinking to myself, “I’m going to have to do this completely backwards.” 

As painful as that thought was, I’m so glad I had it! It helped me to mentally visualize and prepare for the situation. I refused to think of the what ifs and just focus. 

Another very light contraction came. I tried pushing through it and nothing happened. We decided a change of position would be best. So we very carefully took my from a reclined sitting position to upright, bent over the pool, holding onto Jimmy for stability. (Jimmy later told me that his legs fell asleep but he wasn’t about to move…he a champ!) 

Next contraction and some big big pushes later sweet little Joanna finally decided to make her entrance! She was perfect. She weighed in at 7lb 11oz and 20.5 in long at 4:30pm. 

The rest of the afternoon was spent nursing baby, showering, checking vitals every so often, introducing Jenna to her new baby sister…all while our amazing midwife’s cleaned everything up! 

Closing Thoughts

I could not have asked for a better, calmer, or more satisfying birth experience! At the end of the day a healthy baby is all that matters, good experience or bad, but I’m so glad we got both. 

Would you have a homebirth? Answer in the comments! I love chatting with you.

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An All-Natural Positive Hospital Birth Story: Jackson Keith

April 16, 2024

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*Written by Anna Bourdess.

**This post contains affiliate links.

To understand our birth story a little better let me tell you about the weeks leading up to Jackson’s arrival. My pregnancy had been almost seamless up until 35 weeks. I had some pretty severe morning sickness the whole time, but, beyond that things had gone very well. 

At 35 weeks my blood pressure suddenly spiked. After visiting with my midwife and some testing, I was informed that I had, with no warning, developed preeclampsia. We weighed through together the benefits and risks of each decision and we decided that it would be best to try and get me to 37 weeks and then we would induce. I was put on bedrest and monitored my blood pressure closely at home. We ended up in the hospital twice before delivering Jackson, due to blood pressure spikes. 

PROM (premature rupture of membranes) 

Scheduled for induction the following Thursday, I woke up around four o’clock in the morning on that Sunday, to discover my water had broken. Only, I didn’t realize that’s what had happened. For me, it wasn’t like a movie scene where a huge gush of fluid splashes to the floor. It was more like a leaky faucet, and as any mama will tell you that feeling is pretty common those last months of pregnancy. Not realizing what was happening, I later went back to sleep and awoke to the same feeling around seven. By now I was suspicious. 

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My husband, Philip, had gone to do bus route and church that morning but, I had informed him of what I thought was going on and asked him to keep his phone close. At this point that “faucet” I mentioned earlier had sprung a few more leaks and I was feeling a lot of pressure, making it difficult to sit comfortably. Contractions started around nine and slowly increased in frequency and intensity but still very manageable. I called Philip at ten and suggested he come home. By the time he got there, things were picking up. Let me just pause here and say how thankful I am for my husband. He did amazing and I could not have had the birth experience I did without his support. 

We eventually make it to the hospital and they run all of their tests to confirm that I am actually in labor. My triage nurse was phenomenal. She explained everything she was going to do and asked permission for it all. I consented to a cervical exam and we found out I was at three centimeters dilation and eighty percent effaced. You don’t have to have cervical exams if you don’t want to, it’s completely your choice. Just remember, they typically don’t mean much as far as your progress goes. Things can change quickly with your progress or you could stall out. Every person’s body is different and each time can be different so don’t get consumed with your numbers. 

I desired greatly to have a natural, unmedicated delivery and tried my best in prayer and preparation to have the greatest chance of that happening. Once we were in a room, a nurse began bringing in a bag of Pitocin, to which I had not consented at the time. I politely declined and we tried some natural methods to progress my labor. At this time I was having consistent contractions, but they weren’t getting closer together or intensifying anymore. A few hours later, Philip and I discussed the risks versus benefits of beginning the Pitocin and decided it would be best to start the Pitocin to try and progress my labor. I could have delayed it longer, the risk was not high, it’s just what we felt was best for myself and baby at that time.

I had originally planned to be very mobile during labor and also use a birthing tub once at a certain point. Due to the preeclampsia, it was asked that I be monitored constantly which wasn’t a part of my plan, however, at the time I found it easier for me to be calm through my labor while listening to Jackson’s heartbeat, so I agreed. My nurses knew I desired to be up and moving and so kindly brought in a portable monitor since I wasn’t a candidate for wireless monitoring due to Jackson coming early. This allowed me as much mobility as possible, which greatly helped me manage my contractions. 

Beginning the Pitocin 

My nurse and I decided upping the Pitocin at half the usual rate would work best for my body. Since I was already showing signs of progression, we just wanted to give my body a little boost. Within thirty minutes of starting the Pitocin, things were progressing forward again. Since I couldn’t use the tub due to monitoring, I had to use other things in my arsenal of pain management. I brought several options since I didn’t know what I’d prefer. I ended up using a labor comb, and birthing ball the most. I had also practiced breathing techniques which were such a big part of my pain management. Philip was amazing in helping me achieve the unmedicated birth I desired. He was constantly giving counter pressure (which felt amazing), telling me how proud he was of me, and reminding me to relax my body and breath down. 

Transition 

After being on the Pitocin for a few hours, I requested a cervical exam again. To my dismay, I had only progressed to 4 cm. This is why I stated previously to not get focused on the numbers. Things can change fast, and they did for me. We pushed the Pitocin up slightly, one more time, and within 30 minutes my contractions were much more intense than they had been before. I was no longer able to speak at all through them and had entered “labor land” as many mamas have called it. Focusing on nothing but breathing and low moaning through each one.

I had been doing well with the mental game of labor but I hit a point of exhaustion and lost some of the control I had worked so hard to keep. My low moans turned into growls and became much louder than before. More like a grizzly bear if I’m being honest. At this point my nurse had come in when the next contraction hit. She saw me bare down and urged me to resist that feeling to push because if my cervix wasn’t dilated enough it would swell and birth would be much more difficult. I told her my body was doing that and I had no control. Stunned she said “Oh! would it be ok for me to check you again?” I agreed and she did a cervical exam. She leaped off the table and told me how proud she was of me and that I was doing it! I had gone from 4cm to 10cm in thirty minutes and we were about to have a baby!

Delivery

 Contractions were hitting back to back and at this point Philip was growing uneasy seeing me in so much pain, not knowing how to help ease it anymore. He said he was praying in his heart “Lord, I really wish Anna’s mom was here, she would know what to do”. He looked up and guess who was standing at the door? He said he mouthed “help me” across the room to her. I hate I missed that because it’s still hilarious to me that my husband needed my mommy for my birth.

We had originally planned for it to be just Philip and I, but I’m thankful my mom got to be in there. It was special. During all this, contractions are still hitting back to back and the nurse is calmly but repeatedly calling for the doctor knowing we don’t have long before this baby is here. The doctor made it in the room and barely got his gloves on when Jackson made his appearance. By now, he had triggered the fetal ejection reflex and in two pushes he was here. In Philip’s description it wasn’t a delivery, I launched him.

I heard that perfect little cry and they laid him on my chest while Philip laid above my head and sobbed. That will forever be one of my most precious memories. We did delayed cord clamping and his Daddy cut the cord when it was time. With him being early we weren’t sure what he would need so a NICU team was on stand by in the room. Originally, my plan was an hour of undisturbed skin to skin, however, with him being a preemie we knew he needed to be checked out quickly, especially his breathing. Once the cord was cut, I handed him to the nurses to be checked out and Philip followed to ensure all our wishes were honored. No eye goop, no shots, just checked, measured, weighed, and right back to mama if all was well. Praise The Lord it was, my little early boy was perfect in every way, to all the staff’s amazement and spent the next several hours getting all the snuggles. In fact, he’s still getting all the snuggles. 

Although everything about my birth wasn’t exactly how I had planned, I am still so happy with our birth story. Of course all that matters is a healthy baby, but having a no or low intervention birth was extremely important to me. I’m so thankful that The Lord heard that prayer and granted the natural delivery I desired. 

It is possible to have an unmedicated, peaceful hospital birth. The biggest suggestion I have is do your research. Knowledge is power. Pray about what is best for you and then put in the work to be informed on your choice so things don’t surprise you. Babies don’t care about your plans. 

If you have any birth questions feel free to reach out. Nothing is TMI, I had so many questions as a first time mama and having people along the way to ask all my questions to was such a blessing. 

Am I a Blessing to My Home?
Wife and Motherhood Posts

Am I a Blessing to My Home?

Written by Anna Bourdess Let’s dive right into this one.  Go to the book of Job and look at chapters…

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20 Things I’ve Learned from the Best Moms

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Being the Example

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How You Can Make a Difference

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Recipe for Sourdough Pull-Apart Cheese and Herb Garlic Bread

April 12, 2024

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I think we have all had those loaves that did not turn out quite right but taste great regardless. Flat loaves, misshapen, etc. This bread is perfect for turning these mishaps into masterpieces!

The idea stemmed from a flat loaf that was over-proofed but tasted great. I have been working on implementing more zero-waste strategies into our home, beginning with the kitchen. It is amazing how much food you realize your family is wasting when you start to pay attention!

Of course you could use a perfectly good loaf of sourdough to make this recipe as well! It would make a great party snack/appetizer- great for sharing!

Baking Sourdough Artisan Bread

This recipe requires a loaf of artisan bread- preferably sourdough, of course!

If you need a recipe click here for a relatively quick and easy recipe.

Baking artisan sourdough can be a true outlet of creativity! The process is slow, which to some might seem overwhelming but I promise the more you do it the more efficient your processes will become. Here are a few things to note when baking a loaf of artisan sourdough bread…

  • Timelines are flexible! Do not get too stunned by the amount of hours it takes to make a loaf. Sure, it takes longer to make than quick rise yeast breads. However, the total amount of time that you are actually working to make the bread is quite small. The rise times, rest times, and fermentation times can all be adjusted to fit your needs while also still achieving delicious bread!
  • It is more about feeling than measurements. Measurements are almost always relative when it comes to sourdough. We all live in different climates, keep our homes set to different temperatures, and experience different shifts in our environments. Keeping this in mind when you are working with sourdough will eliminate a lot of frustration.
  • If you fail, try again! The first several loaves a beginner makes are usually not that pretty magazine cover loaf that we are all hoping to achieve. Practice makes perfect! Try it again. Trouble-shoot and adjust!

Recipe Ideas for Sourdough “Fails”

Let’s be honest- the only real “fail” is one that tastes HORRIBLE! Anything short of that is a win. Flat loaves happen, even to experience sourdough makers. Sometimes things just flop and that is okay!

In regard to the flop that brought me this awesome recipe I decided to compile a list here for different things you can do with a sourdough fail. I would love to hear your ideas too! Drop one (or a few) in the comments!

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Earthly Wellness is a company dedicated to offering quality natural and herbal products for the whole family! I love Earthly because as a pregnant/nursing mom I can trust that I will have quick relief for headaches, sinus issues, fevers, and other common health concerns all while keeping my baby safe! Use the code LITTLEWIFE10 for 10% off your first purchase.

SHOP HERE!
  • Garlic bread
  • Pizza crust (a very flat loaf cut in half would equal two pizzas)
  • Croutons
  • Bread crumbs
  • Soup bowls
  • French toast
  • Cinnamon Toast bites

If you give one of these a try I would love to know how it went!

Sourdough Pull Apart Cheese and Herb Garlic Bread

Delicious sourdough bread stuffed with cheese, garlic, and herbs! Easy to make with an existing loaf or from-scratch with a fresh loaf of sourdough bread. This recipe is a great shareable treat as an appetizer or party snack.
Print Recipe Pin Recipe
Prep Time 10 minutes mins
Cook Time 10 minutes mins
Total Time 20 minutes mins
Course Appetizer, bread, Side Dish, Snack
Servings 8 servings

Ingredients
  

  • 1 loaf artisan sourdough bread (see post for a link to my recipe)
  • 1 cup grated cheese of choice (I mixed pepper jack and gouda for the loaf pictured)
  • 1/2 cup melted butter
  • 1 1/2 tsp garlic salt
  • 2 tsp rosemary (or herbs of choice)

Instructions
 

  • Begin by cutting the surface of your sourdough bread in 1 inch rows vertically and horizontally (as pictured) but do not cut all the way through the bottom.
  • Melt butter and mix in garlic and herbs of choice.
  • Pour melted butter and herbs over the loaf. Pull bread apart in sections to get deep into the cracks.
  • Stuff cheese into the slices. (I found it easiest to go row by row.)
  • Bake on 350℉ for about 10 minutes or until cheese is melted.
Keyword artisan sourdough, cheese bread, cheesy sourdough bread, easy sourdough bread, garlic and herb bread, garlic bread, simple sourdough, soft sourdough bread, sourdough garlic bread, sourdough herb bread

I would love to know what you think of this recipe! Please let me know in the comments. You can also save this recipe on Pinterest so it is easy to find!

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Caramel Chocolate Chip Cookie Bar Recipe

March 22, 2024

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These caramel chocolate chip bars are so delicious, quick, and easy! Perfect for throwing together in a flash. Soft, gooey, and chewy- what’s not to love!

Caramel Chocolate Chip Cookie Bars

Soft, chewy, gooey chocolate chip cookie bars with delicious caramel swirl.
Print Recipe Pin Recipe
Prep Time 10 minutes mins
Cook Time 25 minutes mins
Total Time 35 minutes mins
Course Dessert
Servings 16 bars

Ingredients
  

  • 2 sticks butter softened
  • 1 1/4 cup sugar
  • 1 cup brown sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 3 cups flour
  • 1 cup chocolate chips
  • 1 cup caramel topping

Instructions
 

  • In a large bowl cream butter, sugar, brown sugar, eggs, and vanilla.
  • Add flour, salt, and baking soda.
  • Add chocolate chips.
  • Pre-heat oven to 350℉. Place dough in a greased 9×13 casserole dish.
  • For the caramel swirl you want to place random spoonfuls of caramel sauce (I used ice cream topping for mine!) in the cookie dough. Take a knife and gently swirl it around until the caramel has been incorporated into the dough.
  • Bake on 350℉ for 25-30 minutes. The center will be very gooey due to the caramel!

Notes

*Wait thirty minutes to one hour to cut the bars for best results! 
Keyword caramel chocolate chip cookies, caramel cookie bars, caramel cookies, chocolate chip bars, cookie bars, easy cookies, easy dessert

Are you looking for a more natural approach to modern medicine but you don’t know where to start?

Try Earthly Wellness!

Earthly Wellness is a company that provides herbal solutions to everyday problems like headaches, colds, and more. They give you the ability to care for your family with all-natural solutions while also offering quality, affordable products you will LOVE!

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Living in Overwhelming Exasperation

March 2, 2024

*Written by Katie Ledbetter

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When my youngest was born my oldest was a few weeks shy of 8 years old. That’s not significant in any way unless you factor the other four children in between. That’s right they were 7, 6, 5, 3, 1, and newborn. I had two I was homeschooling and I was also my husband’s secretary at the time. He was in his seventh year of pastoring the church and he was almost 29 years old.  You can do the math on the one. Life was hectic. 

I didn’t the have the luxury of family living close by or going to church with us. I did have some amazing church family that did step in but all in all I was raising my babies and doing life alone most of the time.  I don’t mean my husband wasn’t around or was unhelpful. It just wasn’t his role to nurse a newborn while changing an 18 month old, wrangling a 3 year old who loved to write on walls, watching ever new trick my 5 year old wanted me to watch, while doing Phonics with my first and second graders and encouraging them to become self-sufficient while discouraging then from mothering my babies.  Did I mention we homeschooled at the church? This meant daily cleaning the church, going to the gym to try to condition my stretched out, worn out body, returning home to make supper, clean my house, keep up laundry, bathe children, remember if I had taken a shower this week, and somehow keep a great relationship with my husband. 

This makes me laugh to read because honestly it never felt like a lot at the time, but now, I have no idea outside of the grace of God how I functioned. I was 100 miles an hour all day every day. And, I loved it!!! Yes, I had my times when I looked at my husband and said, “If you don’t get me a hotel room alone for a night I’m gonna fall apart!” He thankfully did and that’s probably why I’m still kicking, but mostly I’m only here as a testament that God will give you the grace, strength, and joy to serve Him by serving your family. He will give you what you need when you need it. You’ll look back, like I am now, in awe of Him!!! 

Momma, these hard days where you fall in bed at 2 am just because you wanted to take a bath alone or finish the laundry won’t last forever. The baby stage changes to toddler and toddler to school age before you turn around. Soon you’ll look and your first child to get married will be walking down the aisle. Then they give you grandchildren and you see them in the overwhelming chaos that is the life they are now creating and you’ll know how to help in ways that come so easy and yet leave you so worn out you’ll look at your own daughter with new admiration. You’ll look back on your own life and simply praise The Lord for His goodness. 

Earthley

So, when the days come and you think you can’t handle one more thing, stop all you’re doing and load up those babies and go to the park. Go to McDonald’s if it’s raining and get ice cream. If you can’t afford that or don’t have a car, make a tent in the living room or have a picnic in the yard. While you’re stopping the chaos to enjoy your life remember this life is so short and today is the day God gave you!! Yes, it’s overwhelming and yes, it’s exasperating at times, but it’s also worth celebrating. 

Everyone gets overwhelmed and there are times we just have to accept that what really matters is not a clean house or a perfect homeschool day. It’s not making sure the children are picture ready or the business we’ve created is caught up.  It’s simply being thankful we’ve been blessed with this life at all. Don’t forget in the overwhelming exasperation to simply tell God, “Thank you, Lord!!! You’ve been good to me!” 

Psalm 127:1-5 KJV
Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain. [2] It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep. [3] Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. [4] As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. [5] Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate. 

Lamentations 3:21-24 KJV
This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. [22] It is of the LORD’S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. [23] They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. [24] The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.

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