Written by Katie Ledbetter
“That’s YOUR job!” Words every wife and mother loves to hear – said with an eye roll bigger than the moon. I’ve read a lot of articles about what a woman’s job is and what her roll and place is. I see heaps and heaps of responsibility that get laid on a woman’s shoulders. Sadly, I’ve seen a lot of women break under that pressure to perform like a circus monkey too. So, young stay at home wife and/or mother what IS your job?
You don’t have one! A job is a vocation. It’s something we go to as a way to build an income. Being a stay at home wife and mother is NOT a job, it’s a given position by God. When we look at things in the proper perspective we can then find the best way to deal with any negativity we are experiencing in that area of life.
What does a job consist of?
1. A job is optional. Even if it’s your sole dependency is still a choice.
2. A job is changeable. You can go from one job to another to better yourself or just to find something new.
3. A job can become monotonous. You’re doing the same thing over and over and over again.
4. A job is income based. You make money at work and you have benefits.
5. You are under scrutiny and fear of losing your job if you don’t perform to a certain standard.
6. You have a competitive spirit at a job. To be promoted you have to be willing to step on others to get ahead.
7. Your goal on a job is to be the eventual leader of the whole place.
8. On a job you clock out. There are set hours of business.
9. You do not carry your work home. You lay down the job at the door and pick it up on your next shift.
10. Your co-workers from your job do not come home with you.
When we look at a God-given position as a job you can only imagine from the list above how easy it would be for this to hurt and not help your home. That list, when brought into a home, is going to bring: fear, insecurities, negativity when comparing, and a challenge with your authority. So, if being a stay at home mom is not a job then what is it?
What is a God-given position?
1. It is freedom to be an individual.
2. It is placement as you take up your role under your husband’s authority.
3. It is non-competitive as each individual gets to bring their unique traits to the home.
4. It is organization that best fits your design and desire within the walls of God’s Word.
5. It is unchangeable as you walk in your vows and God-given placement.
6. It is fluid as the daily tasks flow out of your hands and heart.
7. It is peaceful as you realize you do not have to go into the world and be surrounded by sin every day.
8. It is opportunity to study God’s Word and beg for wisdom as you guide the home.
9. It is building as you form relationships around you seeking to meet the needs of others.
10. It is sacrificial as you learn it is more blessed to give than to receive.
Being a stay at home mom in this pressurized world is not always easy. This world says we have to have all the things and should look out for number one. If we don’t take care for ourselves first we can’t take care of others is a daily motto I read on social media. The truth is we, as women, from the beginning were designed to care for others. Eve was placed in the garden to be a compliment to Adam. It’s in a woman to try to find areas of compliment in the lives of those around her. Always seeing the needs can be at times challenging when your needs may go unmet. The best way to not get burnt out, overly exhausted, and bitter is to STOP looking at your position as a job and start looking at it as a God-given life placement.
Who’s going to make the meals if you don’t? Who’s going to clean the house if you don’t? Who’s going to care for your children if you don’t? Who’s going to make your husband smile if you don’t? Who is going to teach your children if you don’t? Who is going to pray for your family if you don’t?
Momma, wife, in a world that says you’re replaceable stick your tongue out to it and remind yourself that in your home you’re invaluable. God placed you there!!! Don’t trade that security for the insecurities of looking at it as a job. On the days when you feel stuck, unappreciated, taken advantage of, and are wishing for a change or a way out take time to realize you’re seeing your position once again as a job. Don’t quit or fire the staff. Pick up God’s Word and refresh your mind. So many women who have no choice but to go to work every day would change places with you in a heartbeat! The Lord placed you here for a reason not a season. Look to the old paths – find a godly, aged woman and learn from her. Walk in those old paths set before us and find “rest for your souls”.
Jeremiah 6:16 KJV
Thus saith the Lord, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk therein.